Thursday, January 15, 2009

Interview Thursday. "No Woman Should Lose her Identity" Says ALOTED

I called her Ms. Inspiration, Ms. Thorough, Ms. Purpose and Ms. Intelligent..... she is much more. She is blogsville powerful female member. She is ALOTED, the owner of PURPOSE DRIVEN Blog. I am honoured to be interacting with you, my-lady

Who is this Purposeful Woman?
My name is Aloted. I am in my late twenties but I feel younger every year, maybe that's why I look nothing like my age. Some of my hobbies include gisting, chatting online, reading, sleeping and travelling in no particular order. I like meeting new people but sometimes can be shy to make the first move. I also enjoy writing and as a result started blogging in May 2006. I wanted an avenue to express myslef, my purpose, some of my thoughts, my faith and to meet other people. My aim is to be an inspiration to people through my blog which I hope I am.
I am proudly Nigerian. I currently live with my hubby (Baale) in the UK. We were one year old this Monday, and we are looking forward to spending many more beautiful and prosperous years together.

What is Feminism to you?
Ah, StandTall, I am waiting for you to answer that question on your blog (smiles)

I don't think I will consider myself a feminist as such but I believe in the power I have as a woman. God created man and woman as equals, but we certainly have different roles to play. There is no need for a power struggle between women and men because if we look within, we would see that we have a kind of power that men do not have. It is high time we realised what it is. We can multi task, we can birth a vision and see it to its completion, we are intuitive, we are emotional being yet very strong. If there was no woman, the human rce would not exist. Becuase of woman, men and women of great talents have been born into the world. We are selffless; we are fighters- we fight for what belong to us. The list goes on and on

No Woman Should:
  • loose her identity (the core essence of who she is) in the name of love or anything else
  • think that any man is the solution to her problems. God alone can solve our problems
  • think that any man is perfect. Neither are you by the way
  • hate on other woman
Every Woman Should Know:
  • she is wonderfully and beautifully made and doesn't need the approval of any man to validate herself.
  • she can achieve her dreamsIf she can think it, then she can achieve it
  • how to manage her finances
  • how to experience living life by herself- married or single. If you are lonely before you get married, marriage isn't going to change that

Your blog is "Purpose Driven" as you are a purpose-driven woman, can you give us an insight into this purpose?
First, my purpose is simply to do what is right, be kind to others, and to walk humbly with my God

Second: to support my husband and be his help meet

Third: raise up my children (when they come) in the way of the Lord, so that when they are grown they will not depart from it. If I don't do any other thing right, I pray I succeed in this area

Fourth: to fufil my God's given dreams whcihc includes being a role model to younger women

I cannot say I am there yet as I don't get it right every time but I am on my way to achieving my purpose by His grace. I am learning to enjoy the journey. I am learning from my mistakes and taking each day as it comes

Do you have any female role model? Who is she and how has she in.spired you?
I admire a lot of women but my role model of all times is my mother. I hope to be half the woman my mother is. She has a gentle spirit and this is something I aspire to have, as I don't think Aloted can be termed as gentle as such. She is also wise and patient. I see how she relates with my father and sometimes I wonder why she doesn't argue with him but growing up I have realised that a wise woman knows when to talk and to keep quiet.

In fact I can say my mother "controls" my dad and he doesn't even realise it.
Also my mum is very meek. A lot of people confuse meekness with weakness but I have learnt that when you are meek, you will enjoy peace

What is money to you
It's funny you ask that question. Most of my friends say I m cautious when it comes to money. This I must say is a trait I picked from my mother. My mother made me realise early in life that you do not always buy something because you want it but because you need it. She taught me not to let money control me. but I should be in control of money.
Now to answer you question, money to me is a defense, a shelter. Having moeny, means a comfortable life and protection against the unexpected. The bible says money answers all things. Therefore money is agood thing and everyone must desire to attain financial freedom. Like the common saying goes-money talks and every thing walks (ok we've all heard all the naughty version of this saying)

The bible also says " the love of money is the root of all evil". A lot of people get it mixed up. It is the LOVE of the money that is bad not the money in itself. People set themselves up over money or have even killed and some are en-slaved to money. This shouldn't be. Being financially empowered means "our money is working for us" and not the other way around. That's where I want to be.

Also our money should be used to bless others around us. Givers never lack.

Does it matter who earn more money in a relationship?
If a man earns more than a woman in the relationship should it matter? I think not. If so, it should not matter if the woman earns more than the man. As long as respect, love, honesty and effective communication exist in a relatioship, they shoudl be good to go

Sadly though, it appears to matter in a lot of relationships. If many couples could adopt the "what's mine is yours" policy then lesser arguments on money would occur. Nevertheless, I think there is a lot of onus on both parties to make it work. For the man, if his partner earns more than him, he should not feel threatened subjected to the attributes I mentioned above. You know how men can be egocentric. And because of his ego palaver, women who ear more than thier partners should take care not to rub it in their men's face. It all boils down to the 4 attributes I have mentioned

In which ways can women contribute to the society?
Hmm, well, I think women an contribute to the society in different ways and I will mention three:
  1. Women should learn to be at peace with thier neighbours, not to be backbiters or busybodies. They should aspire to be role models to the younger females. They should be supportive of other women and thier dreams. They should stand up for what they believe and not be intimidated by men
  2. Women are mothers, both married and signle should endeavour to train up thier children and bring them up to have good morals and values. Good families make up a good society. Children are the future so when they are brought up right, they (both male and female) can impact thier commnities in positive ways
  3. In anything a woman finds her hands to do, be it science, politics, economic, medicine, running her home etc, she should do it wholeheartedly and not for eye service.
Do you believe in training up male children to do domestic chores and what impact do you think this will have in the world?
Yes! I most certainly believe in training up all children - both male and female- to do domestic chores. Another thing I learnt from my mum. She had a roaster and every week each if us (I have a brother) took turns to be responsible for putting water in the fridge, washing the dishes, wshing the car etc. Apart from that, everyone had their portion of seeping to do in the house

It saddens me when I hear that some parents take extra time to train up thier daughters but let thier sons off the hook. No wonder we have so many couch potatoes in the world. They get married and thier wives work all day without any help from them. And they are puzzled why thier wives are grouchy or age fast

Training up male children to help out in the house will definitely have a positive impact. I think males will be more considerate and respectufl to the women they meet. They will not see house work as a woman's job. If they are single, they will be able to clean up after themselves withouth waiting for a girlfriend, sister or their mother. If married, it will be second nature for them to assist thier wives at home, which means having a stress-free happy wife/mother and in turn a happy home. We all know if mummy is happy, everyone in the house is, and if mummy is not happy, God help you if you cross her path

Ghana just got thier first female speaker ever after 51 years of independence; do you think this is a break through for women in leadership?
Most certainly, I do not know how mcuh bout politics but I admire women like Dora Akunyili and the work they do. With stuff like these happening in Ghana and other parts of the world, more women will feel motivated to take up more leadership positions.

What more can women do to be in leadership positions?
Like I mentioned eariler, we women should be faithful in anything we find ourselves doing, that is how we can get to the top. We should work our unique gifts. We should stand up for what we believe. omen should begin/continue to read more books/articles on leadership especially on women that are leaders. They say if you want to hide something from a black man/woman, put it in a book. We can learn a thing or two when we read.
Women should develop and have leadership traits such as honesty, kindness, competency, inspirational, broad-mindednesss, fiar-mindedness, courage, intelligence to name a few

What change do you think will happen when more women are in leadership position in thier soceity?
More women in leadership position would mean that the world had undergone a paradigm shift. It will show that we have grown as a global community and ready for a change. Women will surley be empowered. Women and men can then claim fair share of the challenges and opportunities related to leadership

Are there female bloggers you admire? Can you mention 5 and why you admire them?
I think I am going to to copy Afrobabe on this and cheat. Why? Beacuse there are so many female bloggers I admire but alas I can't mention everyone's name. Please pardon me.

First of all, I admire you StandTall, for the difference you are making on blogsville. You STAND up for what you believe and that is something I deeply admire

Thank you so very much

That;s just jara (extra) and not part of the 5 right? (Smiles)

So here goes:

AbujaMaiden: This is a girl who is walking the narrow path and is not scared to share her belief on abstaining before marriage. You rock girl. To me, you are a real woman and a role model.

Jaycees, Rita and Remi: Gosh, any time I visit their blogs, I either receive a confirmation of what god is telling me, or i leave inspired. Sometimes I am too speechless to comment and all I say is "thank you for the word"

Writefreak, Tyger and Nolimit: Writefreak is my very close friend outside blogsville and i admire her and thankful for our friendship. Tyger is also my person outside blogsville. Nolimit knows me through Baale (Check details on her blog) and we are yet to meet in perosn. Very soon girl! I admire how you both write

Good Nigerian Girl: I adimre how you are very Nigerian yet very Canadian. ( I was going to say English just now lol). I am proud of you for yearning to know more about Yoruba culture. May God provide you a good yoruba man after His heart according to His will for you

Vera Ezimora:
You are in a world/class of your own. You amaze and amuse me. You are too rock blogsville!

Madam Standtall, I am grateful for this opportunity to be interviewed by you. In fact, I am flabberwhelmed and overgasted. Well done with the work you are doing. God bless you!

Thanks for murdering English (lol). The pleasure is completely mine. I am honoured to have you accept.


Writefreak said...

I'm first! Wow! Yay

Thanks standtall for interviewing my friend...and for sharing with bloggers her beautiful spirit...i'm so glad to call her friend!
And thanks aloted for admiring

Well done!

Jaycee said...


I don't know how you do it Standtall, but any time I read any of your interviews I leave your blog learning something great about that person.

I admire Aloted, for her blog, for who she is, and what she stands for.


FFF said...

am with aloted every step of d way n dis interview. everything, gurl. this was a thoroughly enjoyable interview.

so, i finally got dis page opened. d first time, it opened allright but i could comment.

Oz said...

Way to go sis.

Uzezi said...

wow aloted. u rock. i have enlisted you as a future Godmother to all my children and grandchildren and great grandchildren.

thanks standtall for bringing this people to us.

Afrobabe said...

Reading this interview all I could do was thank God for my own have no idea how I would have answered this...

Aloted I am still in shock that u married as a virgin so reading this interview upside down now...

But I admire you more than u will ever know...

Lisa said...

Great interview I must say. Makes one look at life in a diffenrent perspective.

NoLimit said...

This gal is too much!
"Alo" baby...thanks for mentioning my blog o!Now my head is swelling like garium!
Brilliant interview...I agree with every word!

LusciousRon said...

Thank you Standtall for another great interview. You let us see another side to our bloggers.

Aloted is fab.

Looking forward to more.

OluwaDee said...

"If mummy is happy, everyone in the house is, and if mummy is not happy, God help you if you cross her path."

This is so true.

I enjoyed reading this interview.
Standtall, good job.

Woomie O! said...

Standtall my darling!!! Happy new year!!! I don't believe we've 'seen' this year, or have we???
Nice nice post. You know u might have a future in journalism.
I'm waiting for my own interview o...before the year runs out.
Be good and abound.

Woomie O! said...

Standtall my darling!!! Happy new year!!! I don't believe we've 'seen' this year, or have we???
Nice nice post. You know u might have a future in journalism.
I'm waiting for my own interview o...before the year runs out.
Be good and abound.

doug said...

Standtall!! You've really done it with this one. Strangely enough I only started visiting aloted's blog a little while ago. A really interesting person she is. Nice post. Of course there are some questions you raised that I'd rather not talk about LOL! Bite me!!!!

Anonymous said...

Aloted is wonderful isn't she.

~Sirius~ said...

Awww, I Admire Aloted, now with this insight, my admiration's shot up!

StandTall, Who's going to interview you?

Funms-the rebirth said...

i like u so much aloted.......

Parakeet said...

Once again you've done a good job with this. Keep it up and yea Aloted Omoba :) is really one purposeful woman

Vera Ezimora said...

Awwwww. You go, Aloted one!!! lol @ me being in a class of my own. I will take that as a compliment. Hehehe. If that is your subtle way of telling me I'm kolo, then I forgive you for you know not what you have said (written). Congrats again on turning one with Baale. May the good Lord bless your union with plenty (even countless) Aloteds and Baales, and may He grant you many, many years of blissful marriage.

I agree with you. If a woman can dream, then she can achieve it.

I'd like 2 add that women should please stop limiting themselves. "Can't" shouldn't be in our vocabulary (unless we are thinking about getting someone pregnant; in that case, we really CAN'T).

Love ya, Aloted!!

Anonymous said...

"... wise woman knows when to talk and to keep quiet." Spoken well.

Fanny said...

For a moment i thought StandTall was a guy... forgive me, but you do a fabulous job and so humbly.

Following this interview i am amazed at Aloted. Girl you've got a sound mind, just see how the right answers flowed out of you. You will surely accomplish your purpose. i strongly second the one of leading your children to be God's voice in their generation.
Let me not write too much, y'all remain blessed.

africa entertainment plus sports said...

"No woman should lose her identity,in the name of love...". Great............just for emphasis.

africa entertainment plus sports said...

"No woman should lose her identity,in the name of love...". Just thought it's worth emphasising.

Geebee said...

One of the most sensational interviews I ever read. Great work, Stand tall. Aloted, you're the man! Sorry I meant Woman! Really, you should interview guys sometime too o, stand tall. No be only women dey this world o. lol

Waffarian said...

Very interesting. I am happy to know her better.

@aloted: congrats on your anniversary.

Anonymous said...

StandTALL!!! mehn its been awhile oh! how are you na??? nice interview...I am impressed yet again oh!

Black Cat said...

That was a great interview. I think Aloted is really wise and her words are an inspiration to women (and men, lol!) of all nations! You are also an inspiration dear Standtall!

Thank you so much for your comment. It means a lot. I was in the hospital for the day, but the friend I made had been there for several days with no real diagnosis or cure, yet she was so cheerful and brave! I pray she will be okay. Other commenters have heard of this numbness and weakness after chemo and say it will pass, so I think, hope and pray you are right!

Luvzya :) xxx

Rita said...

It is really amazing that even in an interview, Aloted is leaving me inspired and purpose-driven. I am sooo impressed with this interview.

Standtall, you are simply too much...well done.

StandTall-The Activist said...

I do hope ALOTED will show face and response to all her comments. You are the celebrity honey. It’s your space.

Everyone, keep watching for more on “Interview Thursday”, You might be next.

Doug: you have a disagreement with some of the things Aloted said! Chauvinist (lol). Let’s chat

StandTall-The Activist said...

Woomie: Career in Journalism sounds interesting. In my confused state of what to become in life, I onced consider journalism. But will just be content with doing it online. Thanks dearie and happy new year to you to

aloted said...

Awww such amazing comments. I am humbled!

Now that Standtall has declared the floor opened, I will be back to response to y'all!!! I shall also be signing autographs ;)

God bless

StandTall-The Activist said...

Chari: good to see you here o. I have being abandoned so I thought.

Black Cat: good to hear from you. I am still purring for the friends at the hospital and you my dear have nothing to fear

StandTall-The Activist said...

Aloted: You are the celebrity! Go girl!

Good Naija Girl said...

I really feel like I know Aloted Babe so much better after this interview. It's a good thing she aims to be a role model because I think she's doing a stellar job. Her true character shines through in her answers, as does her love for God and her committment to being the best human she can be.

All the best in accomplishing your goals, aloted one.

Great interview questions, StandTall!

aloted said...

WOW see all these comments! oya let me start small small

Writefreak- yah! First…aww ore, thanks for the compliment. I appreciate it

Jaycee- yes o…Standtall is just amazing. Thanks! you know I admire you too ;)

FFF- yes o! A supported in the house. More power to us :)

Oz- ehn hen Oz na you be this…long time. thanks dear!

Uzezi- you know I will be taking u up on your enlisting offer….Looking forward to it o!

Afrobabe-funny u said that, when I first saw the questions, I was like shu na jamb questions be this even started dreaming of the questions at night…but God helped me to answer. LOL..why u dey read the interview upside down…it was only by His grace, I cannot boast in myself at all.

aloted said...

Lisa- Many thanks girl

Nolimit- hehehe, girly, I hope your head did not burst o…lol…O se dia. You sef you are three mush! ;)

LusciousRon- blushing..thanks

Oluwadee- Abi now, na mummy dey run things for house. Glad u enjoyed the interview

Woomie o!- I believe Standtall has addressed this. Hope u good?

doug- uncle, how far naa…oya come and raise your objections o.

Marjoram- Yes, she is. I agree with you ;)

~Sirus- wow! only me! lol. Am speechless, thanks girl.

aloted said...

Funms- thanks love!

Parakeet- yes o…omoba ni mi ke ;) thanks!

Vera-LOL. At all, was definitely a compliment. Thanks for the prayer..i really appreciate it…cuz na only u pray marriage prayer for me…and it means a lot. God will provide you your own man VERY SOON in Jesus name.

You are right about us as women not limiting ourselves…lol at women getting someone pregnant…lol

Rethots bros! e se o

Fanny- many thanks for your kind words. Amen to your prayer. I appreciate it a lot. God bless you.

African Entertainment- thanks for emphasising…it is sad that a lot of women do not know who they are any more. I pray women come to the realisation of their worth

aloted said...

Good! One more batch to go!!! I am actually enjoying this...hehehe

Geebee- man o, woman o…anything u like call me. Nothing dey happen. lol

Waffarian- Many thanks…I appreciate it

Chari- nice to know you are impressed!!!

Black Cat- Many thanks for the compliment. I noticed your comment to Standtall. I hope your friend is better now

Rita- my darling! How are you? I am happy to know you enjoyed the interview.

Standtall- Once again, thanks for featuring me. I hope when next I come to Lagos, we can hook up. God bless you.

GNG- Aww, thats for your sweet words and for the vote of confidence. I appreciate it a lot.

Buttercup said...

Aloted is def one of my fav bloggers..very admirable.

Well done Standtall

StandTall-The Activist said...

Buttercup: I am sure Aloted head is swelling now for that comment. How are you dear?

seye said...

Thumb up for Aloted!!!!!!!!!! I SO LOVE THE WAY SHE DEALS THE FEMALE SPECIES! Eye opener in my own opinion

My Passion, my focus, the change that I want to see in the world - is my propellent factor.

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