Sunday, January 25, 2009

Putting "the true-lie" to rest

I so much love the attempt made by a few of the bloggers that tried to figure out which is so untrue in my second true-lie request. Very interesting.

The so untrue one is ever dating a lecturer, No, I never did

But me being circumcised was so true though Baroque was of the opinion that if that were to be true, I would not mention it on blogsphere. I wonder why he thought so. Okay, the tip of my clitoris was cut when I was a baby. That was circumcision and it's so unfortunate that some poor babies or even female adults were made to experience the same ill treatment in the name of culture. Some girls weren't as lucky to have only their clitoris (which was the sensitive sexual part for a woman) cut, they get every bit of their vagina cut, shaved, mutilated!


Even though some of you wanted number three to be the lie ( I trully appreciate your concern my ladies) . This experience ended in given me a costly leverage to trully understand why we all have to say "NO to Female Genital Mutilation". I once worked with an NGO that did a documentary on how they went to Benin City to try and convince those carrying out the circumcisions to help get it eradicated. It was a lot of convincing and educating. They came up with different irrelevant reasons as to why they have to continue the culture... I was happy that some of them eventually embrace another occupation after they learnt that FGM:
  1. makes child birth very difficult and painful for women
  2. might lead to complications that might get her and/or her baby killed during childbirth
  3. might make a woman frigid
  4. makes sex painful and unenjoyable to women
  5. leads to the death of the victims of circumcision
  6. is a common place for infection to start
  7. is a violation of her fundamental human rights


The awareness is still going in some place in Africa because we still have people set in their ways of getting a girl-child circumcised. I read somewhere that a Nigerian couple had that performed on their girl-child abroad by inviting someone from Nigeria to do it (NDQ told the story). I wonder why we still struggle to get this practise eradicated by now. It boils down to the fact that there are people out there that aren't listening. They really have to, before they destroy a life or more lives...

41 comments:

Robyn said...

1st ill claim my socks my prayers to be a firstie has been answered.

Robyn said...

fuck circumcision.fuck it.nothing more.

Anonymous said...

"They came up with different irrelevant reasons as to why they have to continue the culture"

Just like Americans who try to defend infant circumcision and can't. They just start spouting bullshit. Male and Female circumcision is a crime.

ShonaVixen said...

i was one of those who so wanted number 3 to be false, as i stated the documentary of young female circumsion in Kenya is still fresh and the cries of one 8year old girl just got to me...and i think it borders on both ignorance and wanting to preserve 'culture'..these people need to be educated and made to understand that its actually not beneficial in any way...sigh...just hope they will eventually understand where the rest of the world is coming from...

Writefreak said...

I was right! I also wanted no 3 to be untrue but then i think our expereiencees give us an advantage to speak up! Well done for speaking up...i have watched a no of documentaries on genital mutilation and i was horrified!

Have a nice week ahead!

Black Cat said...

If I'd been here at the right time I think I would have guessed right. You are very brave and it is only through people like you, who are willing to speak out against this cruel and barbaric practice, that hopefully one day it may be a thing of the past. I've seen documentaries and read articles about FGM and it shocks and saddens me that such a thing still goes on in this modern, so-called world! Aaaarrrrggh!

Thanks for asking about my tests. My follow-up appointment is not until 13th February so I'm trying not to think about it too much, lol!

Luvzya :) xxx

Onyeka said...

Circumcision is one of the many things people hold on to for the sake of culture and nothing else. And it pisses me off.

I dont even want to get started on the many ignorant things we do as Africans cos I could be at it all day.

That said, i love that you have the heart to put it out there. The more people there are to speak out against such injustices, the sooner we can stop hearing stories like yours.

You go!

Kafo said...

this speaks to your resilience
for real to be able to come from there to work as an activist against the cause

thank you
for speaking out when it is so easy to keep silent

StandTall-The Activist said...

Robyn: You have being trying to claim first position. Hope you didnt get this idea from Afrobabe *lol*
FC aint it at all

Anonymous: Hmmm I feel you really. I hope there will be a permanent solution to this issue

ShonaVixen darling: yes I know you wanted it not to be true, I almost mentioned your names b4 I changed my mind. There are now laws in place to deal with the FGM criminals (if I am allowed to say that). I wish the law will be very effective in practise

Writefreak: i like the way you worded your contribution. it's not a nice experience and it's even totally unecessary. Some people claim fi a woman doesnt gt circumcised, it will make a become promiscous. What?

Black Cat: Yes dont think about the results. Pls dont. I wonder too why such thing as FGM still goes on

StandTall-The Activist said...

Onyeka: my dear sis, I understand your not wanting to get started on all the wrong stuff going on. My gal, they get me so sad and mad.

I heart so many people that speak up in things like this and like you said speaking up about them will be the start of an end to the practises.

Kafo: Thanks for your insight. Life will be a lot easier if we all speak up and fight wrong doings. How are you doing?

Temite said...

Hmmm. I completely agree that this is a rather barbaric practise and its so ironic that it isnt even traditional to west african cultures, it was transported I believe...and now we are being persuaded to not mutilate our children. Stuff like this irritate me to no end. Its extremely disgusting and time consuming and a major waste of public health resources and I think it must be criminalized... damn culture. Gosh Standy, I adore your blog o. On the other hand, I find it patronising when idiots in my class who happens to have spent just months in some remote African village doing unneccessary peace corps work pass judgement. the west has its own form of mutilating the female form...its just not as obvious. Alright rant over. Temite OUT.

miz-cynic said...

i once had this silly boyfi tht used to tease me tht nhe's sure i was circumcised cos i dnt come easily...so i had to ask my mom....she said God forbid!over her dead body...but i guess thts cos she's a nurse and well educated as in....she even went to sch of mid-wifery.but i think for male,its cool...its recommended in the holy books.Islam even says its good for hygiene for males.

StandTall-The Activist said...

Temite: LOL at you time out or Temite walks in. I think some religion especially Islam came with circumcision for female even though it was not mentioned in the holy book

We gave those that came to our land to start raising awareness over our issues the chance. We should try and figure out where the shoes pinch as take charge. God help us

Hmmm. I completely agree that this is a rather barbaric practise and its so ironic that it isnt even traditional to west african cultures, it was transported I believe...and now we are being persuaded to not mutilate our children. Stuff like this irritate me to no end. Its extremely disgusting and time consuming and a major waste of public health resources and I think it must be criminalized... damn culture. Gosh Standy, I adore your blog o. On the other hand, I find it patronising when idiots in my class who happens to have spent just months in some remote African village doing unneccessary peace corps work pass judgement. the west has its own form of mutilating the female form...its just not as obvious. Alright rant over. Temite OUT.


Miz-cynic: for male, they only get thier foreskin or something cut but female girls do suffer more and it's so unnessary. I was reading a medical book where I earnt that uncircumcised mae wil have tears when his skin his trying to make way for his erection and that dirt could hide there. Islam and Christianity mentioned male circumcision but siad nothing about the female but ,well people turned it to a cultural thing and feel it will prevent a woman from having multiple partners

StandTall-The Activist said...

Temite: LOL at you time out or Temite walks in. I think some religion especially Islam came with circumcision for female even though it was not mentioned in the holy book

We gave those that came to our land to start raising awareness over our issues the chance. We should try and figure out where the shoes pinch as take charge. God help us

Hmmm. I completely agree that this is a rather barbaric practise and its so ironic that it isnt even traditional to west african cultures, it was transported I believe...and now we are being persuaded to not mutilate our children. Stuff like this irritate me to no end. Its extremely disgusting and time consuming and a major waste of public health resources and I think it must be criminalized... damn culture. Gosh Standy, I adore your blog o. On the other hand, I find it patronising when idiots in my class who happens to have spent just months in some remote African village doing unneccessary peace corps work pass judgement. the west has its own form of mutilating the female form...its just not as obvious. Alright rant over. Temite OUT.


Miz-cynic: for male, they only get thier foreskin or something cut but female girls do suffer more and it's so unnessary. I was reading a medical book where I earnt that uncircumcised mae wil have tears when his skin his trying to make way for his erection and that dirt could hide there. Islam and Christianity mentioned male circumcision but siad nothing about the female but ,well people turned it to a cultural thing and feel it will prevent a woman from having multiple partners

Temite said...

But they have their own issues that they must deal with. Standy, if you hear the condescending manner in which these people talk...you would be outraged as well. I am super irritated most of the time in class. Well, my point precisly, Islam is not traditional to Africa. The religion was transported as well. Temite out.

Dabizniz said...

thanks or you comments on my blog.. Promise to follow your more in-depth as suggested

LusciousRon said...

Temite there is no where in Islam that it says women should be circumcised.

It's just a stupid ignorant thing we picked up ourselves in Africa. I am yet to find a person who can give me at least one reasonable answer to why it is still being done. that act should be criminalised as mutilation of a human being!

seamstress said...

This is a babaric act..someone very dear to me had this procedure done to her when she was a mere baby

A few months ago she had to undergo corrective surgery because of the way she healed when the "operation" was done on her. That in it self was traumatic enough.

Now she is really scared about being intimate with men because she associates pain with sex and she feels she is not complete.

It makes me so angry, it just doesn't make any sense it my head.

Your strenght in this story is inspiring. Thanks for sharing xxx

For the love of me said...

Quick question-apart from biblical reasons, why do we circumcise men?

aloted said...

wow...i also didnt want it to be true...but i applaud u for talking about it..and for standing up for what u believe.

ignorance is not good o!

standtall..you ok sha? anyway will send u email..make i no talk too much for here...

bArOquE said...

i just tire for this jist...when i dropped that comment, i thought for a second that i was wrong...remembering that you were an activist, and one who was well into women liberation & things...i just didnt think you would say so here

WTF, is this female genital mutilation thing? ...it should, be declared a crime & all practitioners should be arrested & thrown in jail..it is worse than rape

'm outta here, just lost my erection

Tigeress said...

that is just barbaric! OMD!!!

I feel ignorant- cos i had no clue that such happened in Nigerian. I just thank God my tribe doesnt do such.

The lady (with the 2girls) didnt sound Nigerian tho.

Waffarian said...

Babe, I am not gonna watch those videos cos na early morning and I don#t want to plunge into depression so soon in the day...

People are just ignorant.

Education! Education!! Education!!!

LG said...

hmm' na dis kind tori mama molly dey like :)

Naughty Eyes said...

Yeah, yeah, I know this is about FGM but what thrills me is that Number 1 was true! I know you didn't expantiate but if you did ask a guy/guys out before then maybe, just maybe there's still hope that a female will do the right thing (for me, that is)and ask me out!
You need to do a whole post on the asking out thing oh!

StandTall-The Activist said...

Temite: The in and out woman (lol). I quite agree with you o. In fact, if I am in your class, I would have fought well well o


Dabizniz: All right. You are welcome

LusciousRon: in this ignorance of the people that believe in ths practice, they claim women will be lose if they don’t get cut! What? I have heard a very hot argument on this

seamstress: I can’t imagine what your friend would have gone through. It’s so sad. Very sad that a lot of things are done out of mere ignorant


For the love of me: I read a medical book that stated that men that are not cut, will have it painful when they are erected. And that the skin gets a lot of dirt under it and it takes a very clean man to get it washed everytime

Aloted: got your email. Thanks for being a sweetheart but I thought your email will be a consoing one instead you talked about other issues (lol)


Baroque: you asked for it joo. Besides, it’s a good thing to share experiences like this. You lost your erection, for a tad second or so abi?

Tigress: Perhaps she is got accent or something. FGM is common place in Nigeria before now. Lucky you to have known not about it

Waffarian: The videos aint bad and you are right about the education part. It’s just that some people are narrow-minded. So, let’s add prosecution!

LG: I know you will dodge proper comment. Let me catch you!

Naughty Eyes: You hope a female will do the right thing, like what? Well it was true sorry can’t ask you out cos this woman is now married (lol). And hubby knows about those escapades too. He reads this blog as well… let me see if I can do a whole post about the asking out part. I will try…

OluwaDee said...

its very brave of you to say you have been circumcised.

StandTall-The Activist said...

For the Love of Me: here what and anonymous guy asked "I am an uncircumcised male. When I have sex without a condom, my foreskin pushes too far back and causes a lot of pain, to the point of tearing at one point"...

So, the foresking makes them uncomfortable during sex...

Jarrai said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jarrai said...

Its amazing what is done in the name of culture and religion..although i am yet to see any tangible religious evidence for FGM..it is an unnecessay evil practice fuelled by ignorance and opression. I don't know what to say..sorry is the only thing that comes to mind.

There are no laws as yet to eradicate this horrific act...like you said women and men alike need to be educated. However ignorance is no defence or justification for this.

It saddens me to no end.

aloted said...

lol..haba u should trust ur person now...i had sent the email you are referring to before reading and commenting on this post. I havent sent the "consoling" email yet.

WIll still do

;)

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

wow. You are such a brave woman to share this with us. I continue to be against the mutilation of women for the sake of some misguided concept of sexuality and its place in culture and the self-fulfillment for women.

Hopefully, people will eventually learn in time to prevent this from happening to other young women, but only we, as women, can bring an end to this practice.

Afrobabe said...

wow, u r a strong babe...

Vera Ezimora said...

Darling, I haven't abandoned your blog o. I've just not been blog patrolling. Been doing too many things @ once.

You were circumcized??? WOW. Woulda never guessed that. Goodness. I don't even know what 2 say

Ore said...

I didn't know this either. Sorry to hear that you had to go through that. I can understand even more where your passion for the elimination of gender injustices comes from.

katztales said...

Wish all cultures would stop circumcision. Makes no sense at all.

You still taking part in Cats On Tuesday?

nneoma said...

wow, thanks StandTall for sharing your experiences with us. i wish you all the best as you continue to fight such injustices.

poeticallytinted said...

I love you girl. I love who you are and what you are about.

StandTall-The Activist said...

Jarrai: Trust me, no tangible religion reason… and there are laws in place it’s just that I wonder if they are enforcing it everywhere ( let me dust my papers and go for law)


Aloted: Yes, I got those comforting words. You are a sweetheart!


Solomonsydelle: Thanks hon. I am in agreement with you about women being in the forefront of bringing FGM to an end. Even if we are told to do it to her daughters in whatever names, we have to say no

Afrobabe: Thanks and I believe you are stronger!


Vera Ezimora: I know you haven’t really. But I like hitting at you (lol). The deed had being done 30+ year ago, you know. I have come to the conclusion that if we don’t speak up against a lot of issues, no one will know where the shoe pinches

Ore: Awww, thanks for your kind words. I am sharing just a tad of stuff I had to go through or see others go through. Let me quickly go and study that law to be able to face elimination of gender injustice fully…

Katztales: All cultures really have to. The law must be in full force everywhere to put an end to this. Yes, I am still partaking on cats on Tuesday

Nneoma: Thanks sister. Where have you being? Long time

Poetically Tinted: Love you to honey. You just touched my heart. I am not gonna cry…

StandTall-The Activist said...

One thing I want all of us to take away is to say no to Female Genital Mutilation and not to carry it out on on our existing and yet to come girl-child. No matter what the society says, we have to do what's right

Buttercup said...

gosh..i cant imagine the pain...

My Passion, my focus, the change that I want to see in the world - is my propellent factor.

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